Solitary Journey
by Florence Young
"Forgive you? I'm supposed to forgive you? And just what shall I do with the muddy footprints you've left all over my life?
"This isn't about forgiveness. This is about accepting you as one whose purpose in life is leaving muddy footprints -- but never again on my life!"
You've uttered the brave words. They signal the beginning of your journey into a new life. Having made the speech, do you have the courage to take the next step? For the first step -- accepting the unchangeableness of your abuser -- is only the beginning and will also be the ending if it is the only step.
Place one foot in front of the other, lean into the effort and lift your other foot. You aren't there yet, not far enough away from the giver of muddy footprints. You must take another step and another and another.
You will grow weary. The applause and the acclaim accorded you for having taken the first step will diminish, then cease altogether. The end of your journey is too far away? Keep going. The reason for beginning your journey dims, and "back there" doesn't look so bad? Keep moving. Take another step -- it's the first step of the rest of the way. You are your own fan club, your own cheering section. Perhaps no one but you will know when you've finally, truly crossed the threshold of your new life. But you won't get there at all unless you keep on taking the next step.
copyright 2000 by Florence Young -- all rights reserved
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